just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
