Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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