There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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