She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
