i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
