i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I want her autograph on my taint
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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