I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
