I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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