I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
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