how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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