you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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