I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Randomize
