I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Randomize
