Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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