she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
