New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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