you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
