You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
