just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
