so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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