Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
