I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
