Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
