what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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