I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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