ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I still have a little drunk in my system
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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