you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
