we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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