Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
