Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
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