yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
