I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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