so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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