No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
