Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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