How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
