She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
