that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
