I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
