Kiss
Puke
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
