I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
