I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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