I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
