Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
