omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
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