I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
