My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
