yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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