it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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