i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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