i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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