If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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